God designed our bodies with beauty and intricacy. A delicate balance between flesh and spirit that is held together with His spirit and love. There are times when this balance becomes off kilter. One of them is during the grieving process after the loss of a loved one.

Grief affects every part of our being. Our delicate bodies become ravaged with heartache. It is in this heartache that we lose touch with taking care of ourselves. Staying healthy during the grieving process requires us to focus on something other than the pain in our being.

The onset of anxiety during the grieving process

One of the first things we will experience during the loss of a loved one is anxiety. Even people who do not battle anxiety will face some form of it during this difficult time. The battle with anxiety comes from fear.

During the emotional stress of losing a loved one, fear comes in the thoughts of “what will my life be like without this person?” Our flesh has a hard time understanding any reason for someone dying. Death is an event that most people fear. To overcome this fear we have to remember what God’s word tells us about fear, death, and His goodness.

I sought the LORD, and He answered me And rescued me from all my fears. – Psalm 34:4, NASB

When we turn our focus on Christ and His grace, we can overcome the engulfing manifestation that anxiety brings during heartache. Even though grief is hard we can choose to process it positively. It may not seem like it when we are in the middle of the devastation, but it is doable. It is a matter of renewing our minds just as Paul instructed in Romans 12:2.

Unhealthy food choices

It’s so easy to just grab and go food. There are fast food places on just about every corner in every city. This makesfood available at times we don’t feel like cooking. The problem with these foods is that they are not what God had planned for our bodies to digest. These foods are not designed to sustain us in a healthy way. We were not created to ingest processed foods. During grief, we forget to choose healthy simply because it is not the focus of our mindset at the time.

Processed and sugary foods can affect so many aspects of our health. Our blood pressure can become even higher due to the fast food on top of the anxiety that we are already experiencing. Blood sugars can become irregular based on the sugary drinks and sweets we consume. Making healthy food choices isn’t always easy. Most of the foods that are good for us are more expensive than the junk food that we find so much more appealing.

Then God said, “Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth, and every tree which has fruit yielding seed; it shall be food for you. – Genesis 1:29, NASB

Taking time to rest during the grieving process

Even though it may be difficult, taking time to rest also aids in staying healthy during the grieving process. Being able to lay down and get some sleep can be extremely hard when your mind is consumed with thoughts of your loved one.

It seems like the second your eyes are closed all of the thoughts and images of the situation come flooding in like a roaring river determined to overpower the banks of peace. There are some things you can do to help calm your mind so that you can drift off and take a nap.

Using a Bible app to listen to God’s word is a good way to bring peace to the racing thoughts. One thing to be cautious of when using an app to read to you is the volume. You don’t turn the volume up so loud that it causes you to get caught up in what is being said. On the contrary, you want it to be just loud enough to understand and sound soothing.

Maybe you are someone who can listen to classical music and fall asleep. This is also a good tool to use to help you gain some rest and rejuvenate your body. Either method is a good choice to help find rest. More importantly, start with praying that God will bring you peace so that you can rest in His love and grace.

He lets me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness For the sake of His name.Psalm 23:2-3, NASB

Getting lost in the pain

Grief is just plain hard. It is not something we seek, and it is not something that has instructions to help us conquer the pain. We can find ourselves lost in the pain. Alone and isolated because we think we are too much of a mess to be around others. Staying healthy during grief includes our mental health. Becoming isolated is not how God wants us to handle the pain of grieving. That is a lie from the adversary.

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor; for if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up! – Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, NASB

Having someone with you will help you keep from becoming lost in the emotions and pain. Another person will be able to help keep you connected to reality. Being connected will keep you engaged in day-to-day tasks. This is important to your mental health. If you are not healthy mentally then how can you take care of yourself?

Battling depression

There is no doubt that sometimes grief is accompanied by depression. It is one of the biggest tools that the adversary will use to distract you from staying healthy during the grieving process. By keeping you exhausted and sad, the enemy leads you into a place that says you can’t live without your loved one.

He lies about being able to make it financially. He will even tell you that no one else will want you. Taking these thoughts captive is one of the most important things you can do during grief. Change the way you think.

When one of these thoughts comes creeping into your mind, be quick to acknowledge that it is there. Then begin to speak God’s word. Speak the life-giving Scriptures that let the enemy know you will not be consumed by his lies.

 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, think about these things. As for the things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.Philippians 4:8-9, NASB

Remaining focused on the goodness of God is the most strengthening tool you can use when it fails. It will keep you grounded in all of the promises that you have learned from God’s Word.

Don’t stop living

It is so easy to give up when you are hurting in ways that you never imagined. It is easy to stop doing the things you once loved because of guilt. This is not how we are supposed to handle grief. Staying healthy during grief includes continuing to do the activities you love.

You don’t have to go dancing the day after your loved one passes. Once the arrangements have been made and the services have been conducted it’s time to take a step toward regaining joy.

We tend to think that our loved ones are looking down from heaven and wishing they were going to a movie with us. That is not what the Bible says. Our loved ones in heaven aren’t longing to come back to this wicked and chaotic world. They are with Jesus in paradise.

And He said to him, “Truly I say to you, today you shall be with Me in Paradise.”Luke 23:43, NASB

Grief is one of the hardest emotions with which we will ever deal. The death of a loved one brings one of the toughest questions we can ever ask. Why? There is never an explanation of why a loved one passes away. There is only the peace that Paul describes in Philippians 4:9. That is why we must always seek God during our time of mourning. This will assist us in staying healthy during the grieving process.

If you feel that you need grief counseling, please reach out to one of the Christian counselors in our online counselor directory. A Christian grief counselor in Wylie, Texas can help you find the peace that God wants for you as He heals your broken heart.

Photos:
“On the Bridge”, Courtesy of Frank Busch, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Healthy Breakfast”, Courtesy of Lena Mytchyk, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Trail of Flowers”, Courtesy of Matt Flores, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Smoothie”, Courtesy of Nature Zen, Unsplash.com, CC0 License
  • Cyndi Kay Green is a freelance writer and owner of CyndiKay Media. In June 2020, she left the corporate world to become a full-time writer. She has been writing since 1996 with hopes of being able to walk in this calling that God had placed in her he...

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