Kate Motaung, Wylie Christian Counseling

About Kate Motaung

Kate Motaung is the Senior Writer, Editor, and Content Manager for a multi-state company. She is the author of several books including Letters to Grief, 101 Prayers for Comfort in Difficult Times, and A Place to Land: A Story of Longing and Belonging. Kate is also the host of Five Minute Friday, an online writing community that equips and encourages Christian writers, and the owner of Refine Services, a company that offers editing services. She and her South African husband have three young adult children and currently live in West Michigan. Find Kate’s books at katemotaung.com/books.

5 Symptoms of OCD in Children

5 Symptoms of OCD in Children

Kate MotaungDecember 30th, 2023|Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured, OCD|

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is debilitating and causes great distress to those suffering from it. It is one of the most common mental disorders. Essentially, it involves repetitive thoughts (obsessions) that must be satiated with repeated rituals (compulsions). This is especially true of OCD in children. While the exact cause of the disorder is unknown, research studies on pediatric OCD highlight factors like inflammatory damage due to certain childhood infections, prescription drug-induced structural changes in the brain, and environment or parenting styles, among others. Symptoms of OCD also develop along with other psychiatric or neurodevelopmental conditions. Symptoms of OCD in children. While it can be extremely frustrating for a parent to see their child exhibit symptoms of OCD, it is important to remember that the disorder feels beyond the child’s control, so it is of little use to tell them to stop doing it. If you are not sure whether your child is showing signs of OCD, consider these five common symptoms: Excessive cleaning routines. If you notice your child develops a habit of excessively washing their hands or cleaning, take note of this common symptom of OCD. Their hands may even show signs of being over washed. This compulsive activity will start to impair their everyday functioning. Counting, checking, touching. Rituals such as excessive counting, checking and rechecking, and repeatedly touching certain objects are compulsions that OCD sufferers use to alleviate anxious thoughts. These rituals bring a level of comfort even if it causes embarrassment in a social setting. Intrusive thoughts. Your young child may not be able to articulate some of the scarier symptoms of OCD in children, which involves disturbing thoughts that flood the mind: killing a pet, thoughts of violence and self-harm. Older children and teens may also struggle to discuss them, as they bring a [...]

Comments Off

How to Cope With Divorce: Finding Support

How to Cope With Divorce: Finding Support

Kate MotaungNovember 21st, 2023|Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

It’s never easy changing direction in life or giving up on a dream. When you get divorced, there’s a sense in which your life starts anew, with new possibilities. Divorce is often painful, but that pain can shape you in positive ways and toward a deeper appreciation of God’s love. The unexpected ways divorce affects you. When you enter a marriage, you do so with certain expectations. Some of these are legitimate and get fulfilled, for good or for ill, while others aren’t met at all. With a divorce, the same holds true. You may have expectations of what it’ll be like, and these are shaped by media, the experiences of friends and family, and your imagination. The following may be unexpected ways that divorce affects you: It leaves a void in your life. Whatever your marriage was like, losing your spouse is like losing a limb. You’ll feel their absence in your life, by missing them, feeling free, or a strange mixture of both. It can feel liberating. Not having a spouse can feel liberating because you don’t have to account for your time, money, or movements in the same way as you do when married. It is like death, and it brings grief. Your marriage may have been a hard one, and while you may be relieved to be divorced, it is still a loss. You’re foreclosing on a particular future and dream, and any divorce, even when justified, grieves God because that’s not His intention for us (Matthew 19: 1-12) It can make you feel like you’ve failed, or even that you are a failure. If you’re a disciple of Jesus, and even if you’re not, divorce feels like a failure in the relationship. It can affect you and make you feel like you’re a failure [...]

Comments Off

Bible Verses about Worry: Letting God Console You

Bible Verses about Worry: Letting God Console You

Kate MotaungAugust 2nd, 2023|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

There’s no end to the ways things in our world either don’t make sense, or seem out of control. Of course, while they may not make sense to us, and they may be out of our control, which should not cause us to despair. We can turn to Bible verses about worry. God’s ways and thoughts are above our own (Isaiah 55:9), and to Him nothing is impossible (Luke 1:37). We don’t need to worry because God knows the end of things before they even begin (Isaiah 46:10). Worry is when you ruminate or repeatedly think about the same thing in a way that ultimately leaves you feeling anxious and unsettled. Usually, we worry about future events whose outcomes we have a stake in. Sometimes we worry that something we’d like to see happen won’t happen, and at other times we worry that the worst possible outcome will occur. Either way, thoughts about the situation, possible solutions to the problem, and dwelling on the possible negative outcomes are what worry is all about. Worry doesn’t leave you feeling energized or hopeful; instead, it makes you fearful, apprehensive, and distracted. Instead of helping us, worry simply robs us of our sense of joy and rest. Letting God console you: Bible verses about worry If you find yourself feeling worried, one way to deal with it is to allow the Lord to console you. The Bible says a lot about worry, but below are a few verses that can help you. When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul. – Psalm 94:19, ESV This Psalm addresses a context in which wrongs are being perpetrated by powerful and arrogant people against those who are weak. When the odds are stacked against us this way, it can be overwhelming, [...]

Comments Off

Help! My Husband is Depressed

Help! My Husband is Depressed

Kate MotaungJune 8th, 2023|Depression, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Men’s Issues, Relationship Issues|

It is common for men who are depressed to express frustration with understanding and expressing uncomfortable feelings. Men may be tempted to override depression’s signs, believing they need to seek a doctor to treat physical symptoms such as intestinal distress, headaches, or insomnia. They may experience the previous signs in addition to moods marked by irritability and anger. Practical Strategies to Support Your Depressed Husband Because of the historic stigma attached to mental health, men may experience guilt and shame compounded with the signs and symptoms of begin depressed. Treating and navigating depression requires more than cultural phrases to “man up” or “shake it off,” but we can embrace spiritual truth and practical strategies for help when our husbands may be depressed. Prayer. We can support our spouses with prayer. The principle of prayer appeals to God to act on our husband’s behalf. The practice of prayer submits to God, reaching where words alone don’t do enough. The power of prayer lies not in prayer, itself, but in the One to whom we pray, and inclines his heart to receive outside help in places where he might have rejected it. Overall, the powerful effects of praying to the God of the Bible can help our husbands when they are depressed. Provide a safe space. Provide a listening ear without judgment or defense. Avoid personalizing his experience, as it may have little to nothing to do with you. What he is enduring may indicate unresolved hurt from other people and seasons of life that are now resurfacing and interfering with his daily function. Allow him to broach difficult topics as they come up without cutting him off, criticizing, or emasculating him. Encourage him with appropriate verbal and nonverbal cues that convey your willingness to listen, befriend, and champion his well-being. [...]

Comments Off

How to Stop Worrying: Techniques to Calm Your Worried Mind

How to Stop Worrying: Techniques to Calm Your Worried Mind

Kate MotaungFebruary 24th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling|

Occasional worry is a normal part of life. It is a natural human response to uncertainty and can be beneficial when it pushes you to find a solution and spurs you to action. Chronic worry, on the other hand, can severely impact your mental and physical well-being. It is a mental habit that can be paralyzing and drain your emotional energy. You need to stop worrying. The good news is that chronic worry is a habit that can be broken. You can learn how to view your circumstances from a more balanced, less fearful perspective, and train your brain to stay calm. Worry pretends to be necessary, but serves no useful purpose. – Eckhart Tolle Common triggers that cause people to worry. There are a variety of things that can lead to worry. Understanding what they are in your life will help you address them. Common triggers include: Major life changes Financial challenges Conflict within relationships Stress at work Health issues Too many commitments or responsibilities Lack of time Techniques that can help you stop worrying. Discover the root of your fears . Before you can learn how to stop worrying, you need to reflect on what is causing you to do it. Dive into why you worry about the things that you do and what triggers it. Identifying what is at the core of your anxious thoughts can help you find more effective ways to manage them. Fact check your thoughts. Rather than fixating your thoughts on “what ifs” and worst-case scenarios, rethink your fears. Remind yourself that thoughts are not facts. Ask yourself how realistic your fears are. Is there evidence to back them up? How likely is it that what you are worrying about will occur? Do some deep breathing. Worry can cause your breathing to [...]

Comments Off

How to Improve Your Self-Esteem and Love Yourself

How to Improve Your Self-Esteem and Love Yourself

Kate MotaungFebruary 8th, 2023|Christian Counseling For Teens, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

Some people believe it is impossible for you to improve your self-esteem. However, if you make positive, intentional choices, you can discover a newfound confidence in who you are. Characteristics of confidence A person has confidence when they believe that the course of action they have selected is the best one and that they can carry it out effectively. Confidence is sometimes referred to as self-confidence when describing it as a personality feature. People’s attitudes and views about their capacities and talents are described by this phrase. People with high degrees of self-assurance may believe they will succeed in their goals and continue to feel in charge of their lives. People who are confident in themselves typically have faith in their skills, authority, and discernment. They might feel more confident than persons with low self-confidence in their capacity to carry out a variety of life responsibilities well, feeling less anxious and self-conscious. One-time feelings of confidence are also possible. For instance, a woman preparing to speak might be sure that it would go well despite struggling at other times. However, people might also have confidence in most aspects of their lives as a broad personality feature. People with high levels of self-assurance will feel at ease thinking that other people are just like them, that they can perform well at work, and that they can handle the rigors of daily life. People with strong self-confidence tend to be happier than those with less self-confidence because high self-confidence is connected with high self-esteem. A person who has confidence in others believes that other people will do a good job at what they do, fulfill their obligations, or keep their word. While one’s interaction with another person can have an impact on one’s general opinion of others, self-confidence can also have [...]

Comments Off

The Surprising Benefits of Volunteering

The Surprising Benefits of Volunteering

Kate MotaungJanuary 31st, 2023|Coaching, Featured, Personal Development, Professional Development|

Making new friends, learning new skills, advancing your job, and even feeling happier and healthier are all benefits of volunteering. Find out where to look for the ideal volunteer position for you. Why volunteer? It might be difficult to find time to volunteer when you lead a hectic life. However, there can be significant advantages to volunteering. Volunteering provides essential assistance to those in need, deserving causes, and the community, but the advantages can also extend to you, the volunteer. You may discover friends, become involved in the community, pick up new skills, and even improve in your profession with the perfect match. Giving can also help you maintain good physical and mental health. It can alleviate stress, treat depression, keep your mind active, and give you a sense of direction. Volunteering doesn’t have to include a long-term commitment or take a lot of time out of your busy day, although it is true that the more you volunteer, the more benefits you’ll enjoy. Even small acts of generosity can benefit those in need and enhance your health and happiness. Here are more advantages and benefits of volunteering: You can meet new people via volunteering. Volunteering is healthy for both your body and mind. Your career may benefit from volunteering. Your life will be more enjoyable and fulfilling if you volunteer. Benefit #1: Volunteering allows you to meet new people. The effect on the community is one of the volunteering’s more well-known advantages. By volunteering, you may improve your community and strengthen your sense of community. People, animals, and organizations in need can benefit greatly from even the smallest acts of assistance. The act of volunteering is reciprocal. It might be as advantageous to you and your loved ones as the cause you decide to support. You may increase [...]

Comments Off

Will I Ever Get Married? Considerations for Navigating Purpose and Partnership

Will I Ever Get Married? Considerations for Navigating Purpose and Partnership

Kate MotaungJanuary 13th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Premarital Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Few questions burn a place in the human heart besides knowing the purpose and having meaning in our lives. Discovering our life’s call is one of the most pressing mysteries that our souls seek. Learning how to walk in that purpose unlocks answers as well as more questions. For single believers, connecting with the right partner serves to advance God’s plans for His kingdom and our lives whether they ever get married or not. As we walk with the Lord, the questions of purpose and partner may tug at our consciousness as family and friends’ weddings and dates may have come and gone with no spouse for us. Agitation pokes at our peace, bringing with it a longing for our own match among the millions. There may be legitimate circumstances that have deferred our hope of getting married such as extended schooling, focus on a career, or what seems like a wilderness when it comes to available, eligible partners. When marriage and the milestones we’d hoped for seem to be on a long delivery, it causes us to question if we will ever get married. It’s no surprise that the enemy tries to insert wedges into the cracks of our mental and emotional weariness. During waiting seasons, his suggestions accuse God of withholding good from us and persecuting us for not being further along in our relationship goals. It can be demoralizing when a fizzled or non-existent dating experience leaves us with fewer prospects and less inspiration than when we began. It erodes our esteem, making us feel undesirable. It frustrates us, leaving us anxious that the very thing we desire will continue to elude us. Like Adam and Eve, we may be tempted to take our heart matters into our own hands when we feel as if God [...]

Comments Off

How Maternal Mental Health Impacts a Child

How Maternal Mental Health Impacts a Child

Kate MotaungJanuary 11th, 2023|Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Women’s Issues|

Maternal mental health was not always on the minds of many of the people who provide behavioral health services in our country as an issue that needed to be addressed. The worldview has shifted by the year 2020, and the mental health of mothers (and parents in general, more generally) is becoming increasingly important to the community working in behavioral health. Women who are pregnant, new mothers, or experienced mothers are having their mental health disorders investigated by a growing number of healthcare providers, who are also investigating how the mothers’ mental health affects that of their children. According to the World Health Organization, approximately ten percent of women who are pregnant and thirteen percent of women who have recently given birth experience a mental disorder, the most common of which is depression. This results in an inability to properly function and affects the growth and development of their children. The following is a list of some of the most common types and causes of maternal mental health disorders, as well as how the management of one or more of those disorders can affect a child. Mental health disorders commonly observed in mothers. Depression /postpartum depression. Most mothers around the world struggle with depression, making it the most prevalent mental health problem related to motherhood. Although many mothers will suffer from depression at some point in their lives, postpartum depression is the form that affects new mothers more frequently than any other. After giving birth, up to eighty percent of women will experience postpartum depression in some form or another. Weepiness, impatience, irritability, restlessness, fatigue, insomnia, sadness, intrusive thoughts, or an inability to stay focused are some of the symptoms of this maternal mental health disorder. Anxiety disorder. Anxiety disorders are yet another typical problem with a parent’s mental [...]

Comments Off

How Bird and Birdsong Encounters Improve Mental Health

How Bird and Birdsong Encounters Improve Mental Health

Kate MotaungNovember 17th, 2022|Featured, Individual Counseling|

According to research, trips to areas rich in avian life could be recommended by psychiatrists to patients looking to improve their mental health. According to the findings of some researchers, the simple act of observing birds or enjoying birdsong encounters can have a positive impact on one’s mental health. Why is hearing birds sing so soothing? The idea was that when there are dangerous predators nearby, birds will stop singing, indicating safety for our subconscious. People have felt at ease and peace when they hear birds sing for thousands of years due to this association with safety. The researchers hypothesized that exposure to nature and birdsong might be an excellent treatment for a variety of mental illnesses. But it comes as no surprise. There are many excellent examples of how nature has a positive impact on health in the medical literature. Dr. Eleanor Ratcliffe, an environmental psychologist at the University of Surrey in the United Kingdom, is an expert on the psychological effects of birdsong. People she polled for earlier research believed that birdsong helped them concentrate and unwind. However, their perception of these advantages was influenced by previous outdoor experiences involving a specific birdsong. They responded more favorably to a birdsong if they had previously heard it while enjoying time outside. For instance, some bird songs brought back memories of childhood nature hikes. Harder bird calls, like those of corvids like magpies, were perceived as distracting as opposed to calming and concentrating. The benefits of birdsong were more frequently cited by people who said they felt a stronger connection to nature. More recent studies by Dr. Ratcliffe have shown that more people are calmed by birdsong that is softer, more complex, and melodic or harmonic. This effect was stronger the more frequently birds sang in a recording that [...]

Comments Off

12 Next

Kate Motaung

About Kate Motaung

CONTACT INFO

Wylie Christian Counseling

ABOUT US